Bleh, this beta version of Blogger is eating my posts. This sucks.

But my apartment is a shambles. There is basically trash everywhere, my living room is a massive tangle of wires and cords. I'm completely paralyzed by all this.

This is not a viable existence.

I also wonder if there is a chance I'm manic, or at least hypomanic. You know how one of those cardinal symptoms of mania is going on massive shopping sprees. I guess the only thing that keeps me from admitting to suffering from bipolar disorder is the fact that I never seem to be happy. Sure, I do have those nights where I can't sleep at all because there are way too many thoughts in my head, and despite not sleeping, I wake up at the normal hour, or maybe even earlier.

I guess that's what's different this time.

My brain is totally spinning. Like a million and one ideas are racing in and out, half-formed, barely explicated.

Is this what it feels to go totally insane?